Trauma of a young girl.

Trauma of a young girl….

“Help!”

“Help!!”

“Help!!!” I screamed from the dark, stuffy room he locked me. 

He is a bastard! A devil! An animal!

Animal? That’s  even an understatement animals don’t do this cruel things to their loved ones do they? It is even said that animals are better than human beings. 

Why did he marry her since he knew he was not going to love her forever? Why did he marry her when he knows his love for her was never going to be enough? 

“Please help…” I continued crying for help as tears ran down my cheeks. 

My voice was getting faint due to all the screaming and cries for help. I was tired! I was weak! I was hungry! I was angry! 

Why does she still love him? Why does she still put up with him despite all he is doing to her? Despite the maltreatment and shame he is putting her through?

LOVE, those four letter words. Those four powerful letter words simple but can make anyone foolish to the core. What was she thinking? What was going through her mind? Does she think he was going to change one day? Or is she hoping he would? 

My sweet Mom, loving mom, beautiful mom. He has made her his punching bag. He has turned her into a object of shame in the neighborhood. All he ever does was come home, beat his wife, steal the little money she makes from her petty sales. Even when she presents food to him, he either complains that the food was not okay or just throw it on her. Food he didn’t even provide the money for. That ingrate!!

What type of father beats his wife to a pulp and abuses his fourteen years old daughter as well? Only a devil does that! He raped me at a tender age of ten. Ever since then he has continued abusing me without any shame or mercy. I could still remember that day vividly. 

It was a very hot afternoon. I just got back home from school. I  My mom was not at home. I went to the kitchen to find something to eat but there was nothing edible for me to eat. Then, i checked my dad’s room only to find it open. I was glad that someone was at home. I checked outside for him but I didn’t see him then, I went back inside only to find him inside in clad in only towels. I assumed he was going to take his bath but then he started coming towards me.

At first I thought he just wanted to take something when I was standing but he got close to me and grabbed me by the shoulder and carried me to his room. I cried and pleaded for help but it was futile. What happened next was what I never want to talk about. After an hour or so, he came out of the room, went to the living room, took some money, went back inside his room and threw it on me saying I should go and get something to eat. Now tell me, what type of father rapes his tired, hungry and weak ten years old daughter even threatening to deal with her if she ever tries to talk about it with anyone?

He has caused me so much trauma all I have left in me for him is hate, disgust and hate nothing else. I don’t think this feeling of hatred I have for him will ever dissipate. He has made me hate the male specie. No matter how nice they try to be, I only assume it’s a facade. It can never be real!

It hurts so much that the more I thought about it, the more tears run down my cheeks but there was nothing I could do about it. Will this pain ever end?

© Olasonde Blessing Onoshorenma.